Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Home. (By: Jess)

Today/tonight is our last day/night in our house.

It's a little bittersweet for me.

Though we only have lived here for 5 years, this house holds a lot of memories for Toby and I.

I mean, I'm totally not as sad as I was when my mom moved out of the house that I grew up in. I lived in THAT house for 25 years....imagine all those memories!

Nonetheless, I'm still a little heavy-hearted to say "good-bye" to the place where Toby and I began...

It was the 2nd "big" thing we did together. (The 1st was moving Toby to SC) Toby found the house and took me to see it. I was so anxious to find a house, that of course I loved everything about it! I remember the lady who walked us through the house didn't really seem to take us seriously. Maybe it was because we were not married or maybe it was because we looked so young (we were 26), I don't know. But I remember her attitude about us totally changing as soon as Toby said, "OK. We'll take it".  We went with her to the sales office and drew up the required paperwork. I was sooooo excited and Toby was sooooooo nervous. I think he almost barfed.  It was a big deal for us....as it is for most people when they buy their first house. We couldn't wait to make it our home.

It was the place where we brought home our precious Gertrude Louise.

It was also the place where we almost killed her! Bad memory..... moving on....

It was that place where we had many parties with our new found friends! I remember all the fun nights of  Taboo, Monopoly, Dinner parties, Flip Cup, and late nights sitting around the patio table laughing and talking for hours!

I remember spilling red wine on the brand new beige carpet and running around frantically with my friend, Jennifer, trying to find SOMETHING to clean it with!

I remember picking out paint colors for all the walls. It was so stressful! Some colors were loud and unique (turquoise blue, lime green, coral....) but i wanted to make it our own and far from neutral and common.

I will never forget Grandpa Ralph coming down from Ohio and painting our entire house for us! He took so much pride in doing this for us and did the entire house in a weekend! Bravo!

It was the place that saw many heartbreaks and tears.... both my grandparent dying, Gertie's accident, the death of a special student, ended friendships, suffering a miscarriage, several surgeries.

It was the place of complete joy and thankfulness...... many Thanksgiving dinners, finding out we were expecting a baby and then another baby, Gertie's homecoming, bringing home Leo, decorating year after year for Christmas, parties, baby showers

It was the place where Toby and I blew out our 27th, 28th, 29th, 30th, and 31st birthday candles.
It was the place where Leo and Cece were conceived (TMI?), where my water broke, and where we brought Leo home.

It was the place the housed many fights between husband and wife. (The time Toby thought I threw out his nose-hair trimmer was a good one!!)

I remember my sister, Mom, and aunt coming to visit us when we first moved in and going on a HUGE shopping spree to Hobby Lobby for home decor! We all had a cart that was overflowing with stuff and I was as happy as a clam!

It was the place Leo learned to roll over, crawl, and walk.

We started our marriage here and grew in it.

It was the place that once held that distinguished "yard of the month" award for the neighborhood.

It was the place where we watched "Paranormal Activity" and my life was forever changed. From that moment on, I started hearing bumps in the night and i don't think I will ever be the same.

It was the place where all my wedding planning took place. A place where we left as an engaged couple and came home as a married couple.

It was the place of Leo's first birthday party.

Lots of memories...... leaves me a little sad..... but not THAT sad. Our new home on Lazy Willow Drive is ready to be filled with even more memories. Our new home will be our "forever home" and that makes me smile.





Friday, May 18, 2012

"Lost and Found" (By: Jess)

Toby and I are part of a small group at church. Our group is called "Lost and Found". I'm not really sure where the name came from...in fact, this may be a question I might ask at our next meeting.... but joining this group is one of the best decisions I (we) have ever made.

I am totally gonna take credit for finding this group for us. Cause, well, I did. I wanted to get more involved with our church and meet more people (our age) from Brookwood. I got online and investigated. I was drawn to the "Clark Small Group" mainly because they were located in the same area where we lived. That's all I knew about the group. I mentioned joining a small group to Toby a couple times before officially contacting the leaders of the group, and to my surprise, he was a little untrusted. If you know my husband, you know that he is my "shy guy". He like to keep to himself and is more observant than social..... the total opposite of me. Which is why I think we mesh so well. Anyway- he was willing and I was gonna run with it.

I contacted the leaders of the group and got us an invitation to a local wing place to meet everyone. Neither one of us said anything to each other, but we were both so nervous! A thousand "what if's" were running through my mind and Toby was TRYING to play it so cool, but I could see right through him. We arrived there (thankfully not too early....which is what we usually do when we are nervous) and immediately met up with the leaders of our group.

We had some small talk in the waiting area, which went well, and walked back to our table. Immediately we were told that it was not a big deal if we wanted to order an adult beverage (wine, beer, margarita, ect..) We were told that even though this was a "church group", no one there was gonna judge us, so if we wanted a drink, go ahead and order one.

I could almost hear the choir singing in the background.

Huge smiles slowly spread across Toby and I's faces and I swear I would actually "see" both of us relaxing and breathe a sigh of relief.

Already this group seemed like a perfect match for us.

We had a great time that night and decided to go back again next week for the next meeting. And the next. And the next.

Now these people are people I call "friends". They play a huge role in both our lives. Though it took Toby a little longer to "warm up" then it did me, we both are so thankful to God for leading us to these peeps.

I look forward to Tuesday's so much. (That's when our group meets) I look forward to seeing everyone's smiles and socializing with everyone. I love the topics of discussion we get ourselves into. I love learning more about my faith and relationship with God, as well as everyone else's. I love seeing my husband open up to everyone and discover more about his relationship with God. I love the books we read and study.....books that I probably would never read is it wasn't for this group. I love all the extra activities we do together, outside of bible study. Even though Toby and I's schedules usually prevent us from attending a lot of the activities, we are thrilled to join in on the ones we can attend. I love the "girls nights" that the ladies plan occasionally. I love the support that everyone offers everyone else. I love getting to know all these people more and more as time goes on.

But most of all, I love the fact the God lead me (us) directly to this group. No one else could have picked a more perfect match for us. He sure knows what He's doing. :)

Thursday, May 17, 2012

"The Help" (By: Jessica)

"No lifting....anything, No going up the stairs. You are allowed to sit up to eat and shower. No loading the dishwasher or doing laundry. No grocery shopping, or any shopping. No field trips. No more going to work. Don't drive a lot. Avoid being vertical. Take it REAL easy. Ok? Ok."

Come again?

 Is this a joke? 

Where's the hidden camera?

 Why do you want me to die?

As I opened my mouth to object to my doctors unrealistic, totally absurd, off the wall orders......... my husband blurts out, in a zippity-do-da voice, "OK! Got it! Thanks, Doc! Ready to go, Babe?"

WHAT?!?! Have you all gone insane!!??

When my doctored ordered me to go on "bed rest" I don't know if I ever really took him seriously.  I mean, he might as well told me not to blink anymore or refrain from swallowing. I wanted to stare at him for a long minute, then bust out in a loud and obnoxious BAHAHAHA! But, I didn't.  That would have been rude. Instead I looked at him, like a deer in headlights, and held back tears.

I immediately thought.... this is it. This is how it's all gonna end.

I spent the entire car ride home thinking and thinking and thinking and thinking.

I've got to give up control of my child, home, and job. I've got to let someone else take over. Who? How? When?

After a little panic attack of the mind, I calmed down, and took a deep breath. All was gonna be OK. This will be fine.

And they were.

People came out of the wood work for us! I was so humbled and gracious and thankful and overwhelmed with all the help that was immediately offered to us.

Meals starting coming. Parents came to the rescue. The babysitter and her entire family were at our beckon call. Our friends from church came like soldiers, ready for battle, to help us move. Family and friends called, send texts, mailed cards, and checked up on us and we have never felt more loved.

It was (and still is) amazing.

It's amazing how one can go from feeling so alone, to feeling like the most important person in the world.






Tuesday, May 15, 2012

How Ya Feelin'? PART 5 (By: Jess)

The question I get asked everyday is, "How are you feeling"? So, I decided to do occasional updates on that exact topic.



I am currently 28 weeks along. (7 months)
Size of Baby
An eggplant
Gender
Sugar and spice!
Name?
Ceceilia Grace Rolfes.  I have nicknamed her "cecil" (pronounced sea-sull). I can't help but think about the cartoon my dad and I used to watch called "Bennie and Cecil". Leo has become Bennie.

Movement
Tiny Dancer! She moves a lot more, but she doesn't move as roughly as her brother did. She moves in waves or tiny bumps. My little graceful ballerina!
Sleep Report
 Terrible. I wake up ALL the time, with crazy stuff on my mind! "Where is my HS diploma?", "I wonder if I was at the basketball game when Celina played OG and Toby played?" "I need new lipstick." "What should Leo and Cece be for Halloween?"
What I miss
Alcohol, energy required to take care of Leo like I used to, calorie counting, working at school, planning our family beach trip
Cravings
 Ice Cream, pancakes, ice water
Weird Happenings
My sudden drive to make a quilt for Cece! I started it and finished it in about 2 weeks. Leo is over a year old and I'm still not done with his!

My "nesting" urge. Maybe it's because we are moving to a new home in a week and a half, but I've been obsessed with throwing out the old and getting new!!

Advise and/or comments
Good- Wendy (Leo's babysitter and BFF) texted me the other day and told me how excited she was for Cece to arrive. I told her I was terrified. She said "LOL! It's not as hard as you think it will be.  You are so organized and that will help, along with maintaing a good schedule. You are a wonderful mom!" She has no idea how much I needed to hear that.
Bad-  A lady looked at my feet and said, "Oh wow! Your feet, ankles, and caves are really swollen!" My response: "Um, not really. They normally look like that. Thanks, though." Stab.
Best Moment(s)
I have bought a couple outfits for Cece that I can't stop obsessing over! I swear, I go into her closet and look at them everyday! One is a zebra striped dress from Walmart and the other is a pink and white sleeper I found at a yard sale with the tags still on. It may be her "coming home" frock.

My Mother-in-Law got Cecil the most beautiful black and pink sleeper. It is also one I stare at daily.

My Mom told me that she has a Christmas dress for Cece. It used to be mine. I can't wait to see her in it.

My friends threw me a surprise baby shower! It was just what the doctor ordered after being on bedrest for a couple weeks. I got some amazing gifts and felt so loved! They will never know how much that shower meant to me!
Meltdowns
Surprisingly......none. (knock on wood) 

What I am looking forward to
Moving into our new home on May 22nd
My sister coming to visit!
Taking Leo to the Catfish festival
Baby shower in June
How many weeks left
12 weeks
Getting Prepared
Toby will be painting  her room a pale pink in the next few days and my sister and I have a few projects planned for her room!
Current Mental Status
Stable. Let's keep it that way.

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Please no comments. (By: Jess)

Ok. I'm gonna make this short, sweet, and as simple as I can.
I'm a lil bummed that NC did not accept the law permitting Gay marraige.

 I don't know why people care so much about other's people's business.

 I care about myself and my family. I don't have time to care about Jim, and the love of his life, Ed or Sally, and her soul mate, Heather. If these people want to marry each other, who the heck am I to say "ummm.....no. Ya can't".

 Hello?!?! Not my business. Not my concern. Not my problem.

 If Ed and Jim and Sally and Heather want to be married and be happy and build a life together...... GREAT! To each his own..... I will continue to live my life and the world will continue to revolve on it's axis. LIFE GOES ON and Ed and Jim's or Sally and Heather's life decisions are NOT going to affect mine. Period.

But there are some people who are extremely bothered with the fact that Ed and Jim and Sally and Heather want to be married.

Maybe I'm just heartless...... maybe I'm just anti-social..... maybe I'm just selfish..... but I DON'T CARE ABOUT WHAT OTHER PEOPLE WANT TO DO!

If a man wants to marry a man.... I don't care.

 If a woman wants to marry a woman, I still don't care.

If a man wants to marry his dog, I think it's weird, but I'm not gonna prevent it. I've got better things to do......like walk around.

 I am not that important of a person to have the right to tell them that they can't.

The fact that our country has to "take a vote" on wether or not Ed and Jim or Sally and Heather can "live happily ever after" is totally ridiculous in my eyes. It embarrasses me to think that I (of all people) am being asked if I will allow this. Who that heck cares if I agree?!?! Why am I suddenly involved with Ed and Jim's or Sally and Heather's decision to get married? That's personal! I'ts not my choice or place to tell them what to do..... I don't even know them!

Yes, I'm aware of the Bible. Yes, I have one. Several. No, I haven't read it cover to cover, but I try my hardest to study it and learn from it and grow from it. No, I am not schooled enough in it to quote full verses concerning certain topics. Yes, it confuses me sometimes and I have a hard time interpeting parts. Yes, I respect it and try my best to live according to it.... or at least the parts I truly understand.

But..... I'm gonna say it...... I don't agree with EVERYTHING the Bible says and I don't follow the Bible exactly that way I should. I just don't and I'm not gonna apologize for it. Gasp. The beauty of this is that God still loves me.

I read this article from a friend of a friend and I wanted to stand up in my living room and give a standing ovation when I was done reading it.

I want to share it. Read it if you want. Or not. It's your choice. I just found it intresting and slightly humorous. To me it makes a ton of sense and speaks a lot of truth. For others, they will find error's in it I'm sure. And that's OK.   Not everyone has to like the same stuff as me. It's very similar to my taste in movies. I LOVED the movie "The Day After Tomorrow". My sister hated it. I adore cheesecake. My husband hates it.  Ok, fine. Life will go on as it should and all will be happy. 

Please don't take this all too seriously.... cause I don't.

Why Can't I Own a Canadian?
October 2002

Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a radio personality who dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio show. Recently, she said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22 and cannot be condoned under any circumstance. The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a east coast resident, which was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative:

Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them:

When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15:19- 24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?

Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?

I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? - Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your devoted fan,
Jim

Saturday, May 5, 2012

If Leo Could Talk (By: Jessica)

Leo speaks.




In his own way.




He says "mama", "dada", "baba", "ga" (I THINK this is his form of Gertie), papa, and "Ohhhh"




But, sometimes I think that he has A LOT more to say inside that mind of his!




IF he could talk, these are some things I KNOW he would say....




1. Hi Mom/Hi Dad!


2. Gertie, come here and let me squeeze you!


3. Darn these shoes!


4. I'm ready for a nap now


5. I'm hungry. What's for dinner?


6. Mom, put me down, I want to run and run and run!


7. Catch!


8. I WILL conquer the stairs!


9. Mom, please don't sing.


10. Dad, RELAX! I'm not choking, I'm messing with you!


11. I have poop in my pants.


12. Am I allowed to touch this?


13.  Is this OK to do?

14. I want up here!

15. I love you!

16. WHAT is THAT?!??!

17. Ohhh....dog food! My favorite!

18. Mom, why won't you pick me up anymore?!?!

19. Mom- I'm not a morning person like you. Leave me alone til I've had some coffee (AKA: baba).

20. Who are YOU? (when he look at me when i actually have make up on and my hair done)

21. I want some! I want some! (whenever someone else is eating in his presence)

22. OMG, this is my jam!!!!!! (whenever "hot diggity dog" come on Micky Mouse clubhouse)

23. lldona flei lwllais (can we go outside? )


I can't wait til that sweet voice of his really comes out and he can actually say what's on his mind! (or can I???? )

Midweek Confessions (PART 10) By: Jess

It's time to come clean and tell the truth!!!

1. "Bed rest" is not realistic.

2.  I am very proud of myself for my organization lately. Thank you CeCe for helping me "nest". Our new home thanks you too.

3. I can say with 90% certainty that everything in my house has a need and purpose.

4. 75% of Leo's clothes are second hand- and I'm totally OK with that.

5. I'm struggling with finding a "theme" for my new kitchen. I have gone from yellow, to cherries, to pineapples, and now considering wine.  Maybe yellow cherries and pineapple wine? That's different.....

6.  I CANNOT wait to not be pregnant and start living and feeling normal again!

7. I miss being at work and being apart of a team.

8. My wardrobe totally sucks balls.

9. I want my sister to move closer to me so bad, I'm thinking about anonymously calling into her work and telling them to fire her, so she will be forced to come here, looking for a job.

10. I wash my bedsheets every 3 weeks. ( is that disgusting or normal?  Really.... I don't care. That's how I do it. Judge away. )

11. Leo and Cece's bathroom is a Mickey Mouse theme. I'm less than trilled about this, but I'm taking one for the team. I know Leo is gonna L-O-V-E this, as Mickey is his hero. It's not all about me anymore. Sigh.

12. I went to the hospital last week because I thought I was having contractions. I was in a lot of pain for about 2 hours and a little paranoid. Turns out I just needed to poop. Whodothunk?

13. I'm shocking myself with how much I'm NOT CARING about my appearance.

14. I have not been to JCP since December.

15. I have bought 5 things online since I was put on "unrealistic bed rest". That makes a total of 6 things I have bought online in my lifetime.

16. I'm working on making a book out of our blog and I'm so excited about it!

17. Leo totally would rather be around his Daddy than me. I'm accepting it.

18. I'm still trying to figure out how I'm gonna handle taking care of 2 babies.

19. I thinking (kinda seriously, kinda not) about obtaining a real estate licence.

20. I need a makeover.